Mess
Hiatus for a damn long time once again.
As you might or might not expect it, it's gonna be a short one as usual.
My life's in quite a mess now, i feel like im not like the person i used to be before i went into army, or rather when im in BMT anymore. I forget the easiest things, getting tired easily, can never conjure enough energy to do anything anymore, i promise things to people and forget. i feel like such a mess now. i need to know what is taking away all my energy these days.
people at work are stirring shit behind me and although i don't really care, but it's indirectly affecting my life at work. do i really have to do everything infront of everyone to show that im actually doing something at work? sometimes i really wonder if what they say about me is true, that im not doing anything and that im inefficient. sometimes it just gets to you when so many people are talking about it.
if my old self was standing infront of me, he would be terribly ashamed of me.
if you haven't seen a man's confidence shaken and almost breaking before,
here you go.
As you might or might not expect it, it's gonna be a short one as usual.
My life's in quite a mess now, i feel like im not like the person i used to be before i went into army, or rather when im in BMT anymore. I forget the easiest things, getting tired easily, can never conjure enough energy to do anything anymore, i promise things to people and forget. i feel like such a mess now. i need to know what is taking away all my energy these days.
people at work are stirring shit behind me and although i don't really care, but it's indirectly affecting my life at work. do i really have to do everything infront of everyone to show that im actually doing something at work? sometimes i really wonder if what they say about me is true, that im not doing anything and that im inefficient. sometimes it just gets to you when so many people are talking about it.
if my old self was standing infront of me, he would be terribly ashamed of me.
if you haven't seen a man's confidence shaken and almost breaking before,
here you go.
posted by egomy at 4/10/2006 11:40:00 PM
1 Comments:
Don't be so hard on yourself. You've done a lot outside NS and proved yourself efficient many times over - sounds like it's just the environment you're stuck in that's unhealthy, not you. Cheer up!
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