Darkest Days

it's been months since i actually made a post here.

a lot has happened since i last blogged and i must say that right now, im going through the darkest days of my life. i can't remember when was the last time i actually slept through the whole night peaceful without the help of medication.

i feel very numb right now, about everything in life. i don't feel like doing anything, losing interest in things that once interest me (as you can see that i've stopped blogging for a while), i know that i shouldn't be feeling this way and i should force myself to do stuff but the feeling just overwhelms and consumes me.

bouts of craziness recently have really taken a toll on me. stress from all the work that piled up from all the times that i didn't feel like doing anything because of the overwhelming feeling is driving me up the wall. i really feel like im being cornered right now and im desperately fighting for my life to survive now.

will i survive this? i really don't have an answer, i feel like im almost at my limit already and i might just snap anytime. im fighting it. i hope i'll get through this..